there are times...
26/08/09 15:48 Filed in: life
There are times when things are going well, and times when they are not. It’s a simple fact of life that we all need to deal with. The key, I think, and I’m sure I’m oversimplifying just a bit, is to revel in the good times, and learn from the bad. At the same times, reflection is paramount. Reflection entails not simply dwelling on the bad times, but actually seeking a better way to go about whatever it was the next time we are faced with a similar situation. Also, reflecting on the good times to remember what made them happen in the first place, and to try and recreate the situations that gave rise to the experience.
I, as most of us do, spend a great deal of wasted energy beating myself up when I feel I’ve failed at anything. But I don’t always take the next step, that is, working to avoid repeats of failures. When I do take the opportunity to reflect, in a meaningful way, I find that inattention to detail is often the root cause of failure, and the precursor to guilt. Guilt has its place, but it really needs to be kept in check in order to perform its function properly. That function is of course to prevent us from repeating mistakes. It can, and will if not properly reigned in, lead to self doubt, pity, or in extreme circumstances, feelings of depression and inadequacy.
We are all born with an infinite set of possibilities in life, if we know to properly seek out and act on the fleeting moments of chance we are given. In contrast to seeking out the faults and deficiencies in ourselves and others.
This is not to say that we should ignore them, but it is important to realize that in order to affect change in another’s behavior, it is imperative that we constantly strive to better ourselves by learning not to repeat mistakes, treat them as learning experiences, and maybe most important of all, forgive those around us for their own shortcomings, and train ourselves not to imitate behavior that we find distasteful in others.
By leading through example, rather than by decree, I believe we will find ourselves surrounded by people whose own goals echo our own. And less so by people whose negative thoughts and ideas cry out with the need to be shared with others who are
I, as most of us do, spend a great deal of wasted energy beating myself up when I feel I’ve failed at anything. But I don’t always take the next step, that is, working to avoid repeats of failures. When I do take the opportunity to reflect, in a meaningful way, I find that inattention to detail is often the root cause of failure, and the precursor to guilt. Guilt has its place, but it really needs to be kept in check in order to perform its function properly. That function is of course to prevent us from repeating mistakes. It can, and will if not properly reigned in, lead to self doubt, pity, or in extreme circumstances, feelings of depression and inadequacy.
We are all born with an infinite set of possibilities in life, if we know to properly seek out and act on the fleeting moments of chance we are given. In contrast to seeking out the faults and deficiencies in ourselves and others.
This is not to say that we should ignore them, but it is important to realize that in order to affect change in another’s behavior, it is imperative that we constantly strive to better ourselves by learning not to repeat mistakes, treat them as learning experiences, and maybe most important of all, forgive those around us for their own shortcomings, and train ourselves not to imitate behavior that we find distasteful in others.
By leading through example, rather than by decree, I believe we will find ourselves surrounded by people whose own goals echo our own. And less so by people whose negative thoughts and ideas cry out with the need to be shared with others who are